The Village Talent Show

A while ago, I went with a friend (check out her blog: Knit Me A Cake )

to what I understood to be a folk gig at an open mic style event in a pub, it turned out to be a village talent show. One that I myself didn't have to be part of, just observe.

What I saw was a group of people, no more than 50 of them, from one tiny village in rural Surrey, having the best time, at an event that for an outsider seemed really quite bizarre, and lacking in the level of talent I thought I was going to be entertained by that evening. Don't get me wrong there was indeed some gifts floating around but for the most part it was awful jokes and awkwardness.

As I watched a beautiful thing began to unravel before me. Wrapped up tightly hidden among the crass jokes and the village banter was something deeper, more profound, something that in reflection I believe we are severely lacking today in our lives. The very essence of community, no barriers, no walls, no wriggling away from the fact that community means giving, even when you think what you have to give is nothing special. It's saying its alright to mess up, to get it wrong, or to never really get it quite right, but giving it a go anyway, knowing that amongst it all you are loved no matter what you share.

We need to have less barriers, less fear & more vulnerability.  Nothing of vulnerability is showy, arrogant or about pushing past someone else on the way to the top (whatever that may be or mean). Vulnerability is about acknowledging our downfalls, and our gifts, its about telling the stories in our lives of bravery & courage, even if the ending is nothing like that of a fairy tale.  

I don't want to be focused, as I was when I entered that village talent contest, on how lacking people are, how imperfect they are, or how they haven't got it quite right.  I want to enter peoples lives and remain alongside people in the belly laughter, the joy, the tears and the brave hearts that win battles every moment of every day in spite of themselves.  I want to laugh at bad jokes, and smile at lives that are so out of tune they hurt your ears, but that deep in its very core there is belonging, vulnerability & joy. 

  

"Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” 

Brené Brown

Unknown Friends

So, I'm sitting in yet another airport en route to New Zealand. This time I'm on the solid ground of Brisbane.
(It feels good to be on land.)

As I came through customs and into the transit lounge I suddenly had a whole heap of memories come flooding back to me from the last time I visited Brisbane. It's a story worth telling, especially to those of us who would rather sit in silence on our travels and not engage with anyone (myself included - I don't really enjoy the superficial chat).

Now to put it into context last time I was travelling from Goa, India to get to New Zealand in time for Christmas, and so had a very wonderful flight sequence where I was able to drop in to Brisbane to visit a friend for the day (names have been removed for protection purposes but - check out her blog while your around the blogging world...http://www.claire-matthews.blogspot.com.au ) and then she would drop me back in the evening to catch my flight.

It did not happen as planned. I remember the moment well,
'I'll just wait here while you check your flight'
'Nah don't worry you go, it will be fine!'

At my word the car and friend leave, and I walk in, look up, only to find my flight flick round at that very moment as 'delayed' on the screens. Well, only for a couple of hours but still, would have been nice to know in advance of that moment!

I wait for a couple of hours and in those two hours, a lady doing a survey asks for my help, as I'm simply waiting I assist in the survey about why I've come on holiday to Australia, I couldn't really answer her questions so we had a little chat about what I did in India, and working for a charity & church and then she left.

The next thing I know is being woken up like something from a film, you'll know what I mean, they lock a camera behind the eye of the one waking up... I'm all blurry eyed, brain completely disengaged but trying desperately to make some sense of what's going on, i literally have no idea where I am or who this strange lady is talking to me. Clinging to words that I'm sure sounded something like this,
Eushhagaagbashhass. Certain of it.

Apparently I had fallen into a deep deep sleep that was very tough to wake up from! The survey lady had in the meantime interviewed a girl called Ciara - ...and was really excited that Ciara was also a Christian and was going to work for a charity. So the survey lady walked off and said, 'you must have a lot to talk about' ... What?! How did she think let alone know that, I was asleep, clearly a deep one, and she just woke me up to talk to a stranger! I AM SO TIRED I WANT TO VOMIT. (My exact grumpy tired thoughts).

The thing is, this interfering survey lady was right, Ciara was meant to be on this delayed flight too, and so we began to talk and share our stories, and the flight kept getting delayed, and we kept talking. And then after waiting for almost 8 hours after the expected departure time, they informed us they would have to cancel the flight, the plane was broken.

Panic broke out and we were sitting among another film like scene with people rushing and shouting (it's the 23rd December 9pm by this point). My main panic was that I would have to spend more time on my own and I was already pushing the limits!

Then the most incredible situation occurred, Ciara disappeared, and I found her sobbing in the toilet, she was going to see her boyfriend for two days (one of which had already been taken up waiting for the flight), for a party, and with this cancellation she would miss the party and only have half a day there. She was devastated, understandably. That too it was Christmas.

But in that moment, God broke in, well I think He broke in way before this moment but perhaps this is the moment I realised! I was able to help Ciara figure out the options and we just prayed together, that was all, but that was all that was needed in that moment.
We then shared even more stories as the airport put us in a hotel and we shared a hotel room. They bought us dominos and all was well. Ciara left on the first flight out of Brisbane on Christmas Eve and I left later that day.

For 13 hours, I made a friend. We shared things that friends only share after a lifetime of knowing one another. And I have never seen her again, I'm not friends with her on Facebook, she doesn't follow me on twitter and I don't even know exactly how you spell her name!

In those hours we met with god, and we walked one another's journeys together.

We don't always know where people are at, but we assume that wherever that is, it shouldn't interfere with us. Particularly when we travel.
We tend not to give anyone time, because its an inconvenience, even when we are waiting or just sleeping!

What struck me as those memories filled my again is that I was on a bit of a pilgrimage in the season that was my life back then, I could argue that I still am. Ciara became part of that journey, and I don't think I will forget the impact it has had on how I travel, who I speak to, and how I see God, more and more in the people I meet.

Give someone some of your time, even when you don't know them, there will be friends in your life one day that you don't even know yet. Blessed much?!

...I know

There are some people in my life, that I call the 'I know' people. These kind of people look at you and know what your thinking or feeling, and sometimes they let on and other times they keep hush hush.

Recently another one of these 'I know' people stepped into my life and joined part of my journey.
That's when I began to wonder what was going on in me that meant people just 'knew' what I thought or felt before I had even really had a chance to think it or feel it. They tend to wait until I say whatever it was they already knew to affirm that after all of the strange and wonderful ways I have of getting to a point or a revelation, they had arrived at that thought, moments, days, months, or sometimes even years before.

You may have these kind of people in your life, or perhaps you are an 'I know' person, the type of patient, kind and loving human being who knows, and yet, lets people walk their journey at their own pace and realise life lessons, however painful it is to watch!

I've come to love and mildly resent the term 'I know' because of these people. I mildly resent it because of the number of times people speak into my life who knew the whole time I was gonna get there, but refused to give me direction, because it was my journey to go on! (How beautifully irritating).
Because every time I hear it, I too know that it was inevitable, it was always going to be that way, it just took my thoughts some time to catch up with my heart.
Because when I start to share my heart, I've apparently already given it away in my facial expression, behaviour, or the air around me, and I get frustrated at my lack of openness, is it really that difficult?!

I love it, because I love that people know me, I resent it because I wish they would just tell me, I hope they never stop and I never want to hear it again, but as soon as I hear it - I know that people have been looking beyond the superficial, seeing something deeper, getting to know the beat of my heart, it's trials and joys, and that comforts me.

Often our hearts simply resonate with someone else's, and words are not needed, and so the 'I know' comes from a place where other words would be empty and you are just filled with empathy and understanding. 'I know' can be some of the most comforting words to hear, they are not judging, trying to give an answer, but they reach right into your heart and sit there next to whatever is going on, without need to draw out answers beyond what we can bear.

The words 'I know' have become comforting, prophetic, irritating, and have meant drawing closer & deeper in my relationships. Including the one relationship that is often beyond words.

I am a child of a God who knows, He knows all, He is all knowing, and when he says, I know, he really does, he has been there, he has gone before us, he knows every hair on our head, he has felt our pain and carried our sorrow, he took it to the cross and overcame it in death and resurrection - He knows. He has a plan ... Even when we don't know.
So even if you don't have anyone in your life that knows you as well as you'd like, there is an all-loving all-knowing God who does, in fact he knows more about you than even you. Now that's comforting.

But like all relationships we cannot sit always in silence, never self reflecting, or figuring out our journey, waiting for others to so it for us. We have just as much responsibility to communicate where we are at to those around us who seek to support us, and love us. Communication is often hard when it's from a painful or confusing place, to friends, or to God, but it is crucial if we are to grow. We must say often, 'I think' or 'I feel' in order that we hear the 'I know'.

I thank God for 'I know' people, for their perseverance, gentleness, relentless love and patience and for the way they reflect Gods heart in my life. I pray you too would know people like this in yours.


“One of the tasks of true friendship is to listen compassionately and creatively to the hidden silences. Often secrets are not revealed in words, they lie concealed in the silence between the words or in the depth of what is unsayable between two people.”
John O'Donohue , Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom